dreadfulpenny: (Jack.funnyworld)
We are finally finished with the Hell Apartment.

It could have been so much worse. But the longer that we lived there, the easier it was to see that it was a thrown together, cheap, unclean sort of place that had no ventilation and POT HOLES in all of the floors (there were dips in every room, places where chunks of the floor were missing -- their solution was to simply put carpet or linoleum OVER the holes). I swear it has mold. I saw it in the bathroom, behind the tiles. It looked like mildew on steroids, which it essentially was. There was so much wrong with that place that going into it would mean me writing for hours about the horrible place that it was. I do not want to do that.

We are currently staying at Mother In Law's house. We'll be moving into our new place on October 15th. I am feeling so much better now that I'm not staying in the old apartment. Physically speaking, I am not waking up with a headache and a stuffy head, my sense of smell has gotten better (it had faded a lot) and so has my sense of taste. Last night I could *taste* iceberg lettuce in my husband's salad. I had forgotten that iceberg lettuce even *had* a taste, as little as it is. I've been sleeping better (granted it's only been three nights and two of those nights were glorified naps). I am feel so clearheaded right now. It's amazing. I cannot get over this feeling. Sleeping late for the last year has always led to headaches and a horrible feeling. I suspect that I wasn't breathing correctly in my sleep at the last place and that was the cause of the headaches and the insomnia. I was becoming convinced that I had sleep apnea (and I may still). But I feel *good* this morning. And I felt that way yesterday and the day before. Maybe I have stronger allergies than I knew before. Mother In Law doesn't have carpet in any rooms except the bedrooms and office. The rest of the house is tiled.

That apartment was bad for me in a lot of ways. I can see that now that I'm out. I cannot get over how much better I am feeling right now. I feel like myself. That's a magical feeling.

...And I'm sitting outside in Mother In Law's back yard and a dragonfly just sailed by. There are moths and birds and trees and flowers and the only non-natural sound is coming from me and Brandon Flowers singing to me while I write. The dogs are searching for moles. The puppy is digging in the dirt (she loves to dig) and even though I know that Mother In Law won't like it, I don't have the heart to stop her.

I am so content right now. I just wanted to throw that out there while I was thinking about it. The sun is shining, it's not hot and I have new-to-me music by one of my favorite artists (the Flowers album is awesome so far). Even though all of my belongings are haphazardly packed up and stuffed in Mother In Law's garage, and I am still aware of the financial issues, I am still somehow happy right now.

Anyway! Today is our day OFF. I am sitting outside in the perfect weather and I am getting ready to read fiction. Later we're going to Red Lobster for Endless Shrimp, because my husband loves it and he has worked so hard in the last week. We'll watch Six Feet Under and maybe, just maybe, I will write. Tomorrow I anticipate much of the same, only perhaps with some light housework, as I don't want to allow our borrowed house to become cluttered or dirty.

July 2015

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